More Important Than That

I was challenged and convicted tonight as we sat together and spoke of the man who wanted Jesus to wait for him to go and bury his father before leaving to follow him. (Matt. 8:21,22) Jesus' response? Follow me, let the dead bury the dead. The implications of this really hit me hard. Ever since Katie died, closure has been an absolute necessity for me.

The last time I saw Katie was Friday morning, January 31, 2003... She died the next morning in a climbing accident. I never saw her again. Because she was alive the last time I saw her, I spent the next month waiting for her to walk around the corner or come out of her dorm... Every tall brunette with a blue jean jacket was Katie. Every time I heard her name, my heart jumped as I turned around to look for her, and it broke all over again as I realized once again that she was gone. I don't remember how long it took me to get past looking for her everywhere I went or to stop waiting for her to appear. But ever since then, closure has been a necessity.

When I think of Jesus telling this man to follow him and not go to bury his father, my heart breaks for the man... It doesn't seem fair. He would have to leave his mother or any other family, not go to his father's funeral, and follow Christ... It wasn't like Christ waited for the man's response, and then pulling him aside he tells him to go and bury his father, that he would wait for him. No, he said follow me... let the dead bury the dead. Here Jesus is saying "I am more important than that. Follow me." ...I am more important than your father, more important than your family, more important than your desires, more important than life itself... follow me.

I am convicted. I am ashamed. I long to love Christ like that... to leave all and follow him. To just lay it down... to believe in something so much that nothing else in life matters. Lord, please help my unbelief!